Rodney Dangerfield quotes

My psychiatrist told me I was crazy and I said I want a second opinion. He said okay, you're ugly …My psychiatrist told me I was crazy and I said I want a second opinion. He said okay, you're ugly too.

Opinion Beauty Funny Humor

Once I pulled a job, I was so stupid. I picked a guy's pocket on an airplane and made a run for …Once I pulled a job, I was so stupid. I picked a guy's pocket on an airplane and made a run for it.

Humor Funny

I came from a real tough neighborhood. Once a guy pulled a knife on me. I knew he wasn't a …I came from a real tough neighborhood. Once a guy pulled a knife on me. I knew he wasn't a professional, the knife had butter on it.

Funny

What a kid I got, I told him about the birds and the bees and he told me about the butcher and my …What a kid I got, I told him about the birds and the bees and he told me about the butcher and my wife.

Children Humor

I came from a real tough neighborhood. Why, every time I shut the window I hurt somebody's …I came from a real tough neighborhood. Why, every time I shut the window I hurt somebody's fingers.

Funny Humor






All Rodney Dangerfield quotes