“ The problem, simply put, is that we cannot choose everything simultaneously. So we live in danger of becoming paralyzed by indecision, terrified that every choice might be the wrong choice. ”
Source: Committed: A Skeptic Makes Peace with Marriage
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When we choose to love, we choose to move against fear, against alienation and separation. The choice to love is a choice to connect, to find ourselves in the other. 
The problem with marriage is that it ends every night after making love, and it must be rebuilt every morning before breakfast. 
The problems we face, did not come down from the heavens. They are made, they are made by bad human decisions, and good human decisions can change them. 
There is everything you know and there is everything that happens. When the two do not line up, you make a choice. 
I admit it: I am louder than the average human being and have no fear of speaking my mind. These traits don't come from the color of my skin but from an unwavering belief in my own intelligence.